In this esey I want to describe a subject: "Mobile phones are the best invention ever" and introduce my own opinion about that.
Mobile phones are basic part of equipment all of us, most people can't live without this toy. (i słusznie) That is happend, since mobile phones make possible communicating with parents and stay in touch with our friends. There is second point, that mobile phones are the source of entertainment - we can restore music and play a lot funny games. This invention helps us in journeys and in every-day life for example in case of steal we can call the police.
However, mobile phone have disadvantages too. We can become addicted to them and we waste a lot of money.
I supose after all that mobile phones are the best invention ever, we owe them feeling save and (dzięki nim) parents usually know what is hapenning with their children.
I'm small and I've got 8 years old. My older sister attends to 2nd class of high school and she's got almost 18 years old.My younger brother - Dawid attends to class "0" and he's got 6 years old. My mom and dad are very fine and I love them. I supose that's all. But I wanted to describe my room, which is green and yellow. There are a lot of toys and funny games. I spend most of my free time there.
Chciałam, żeby mi ktoś to sprawdził i dopisał to co jest po polsku :)
(i słusznie) - and rightly so
(dzięki nim) - thanks to them
więc tak, w tekście o telefonach
pierwsze zdanie zmieniłabym na coś takiego bo brzmi trochę bardziej sensownie i nie powtarzasz tak ciągle tego "of" > mobile phones are basic part of OUR equipment
i słusznie jest trudno przetłumaczyć więc ja napisałabym > and definitely, ale z kolei to zdanie jest trochę dziwne, musisz mi powiedziec co masz na myśli.
następnie po przecinku słowo possible na koniec :> więc> since mobile phones make communicating with parents POSSIBLE and LET US stay in touch with our friends.
w tym zdaniu bez słowa that, jest ono w sumie niepotrzebne, ale też nie przeszkadza >there is second point, mobile phones.....
EVERYDAY, a nie every-day
in case of STEALING
w tym zdaniu jest liczba pojedyncza os. 3 więc używamy has, a nie have >However, mobile phone HAS disadvantages too
dzięki nim > thanks to them
kolejny tekst
nie mówi się i've got, tylko I AM 8 years old.
w kolejnym zdaniu wyrzuć TO > my older sister attends 2nd class... i oczywiście dalej SHE IS 18 years old :)
z bratem to samo xD >attends class "0", that's all.
następne zdanie jest trochę bez sensu więc zmienimy na np > I wanted to describe my room as well.
:)