Question

Chciałam żeby mi ktoś sprawdził czy jest dobrze i dopisał to co jest po polsku. Dzieki :)

In this esey I want to describe a subject: "Mobile phones are the best invention ever" and introduce my own opinion about that.

Mobile phones are basic part of equipment all of us, most people can't live without this toy. (i słusznie) That is happend, since mobile phones make possible communicating with parents and stay in touch with our friends. There is second point, that mobile phones are the source of entertainment - we can restore music and play a lot funny games. This invention helps us in journeys and in every-day life for example in case of steal we can call the police.
However, mobile phone have disadvantages too. We can become addicted to them and we waste a lot of money.

I supose after all that mobile phones are the best invention ever, we owe them feeling save and (dzięki nim) parents usually know what is hapenning with their children.

I'm small and I've got 8 years old. My older sister attends to 2nd class of high school and she's got almost 18 years old.My younger brother - Dawid attends to class "0" and he's got 6 years old. My mom and dad are very fine and I love them. I supose that's all. But I wanted to describe my room, which is green and yellow. There are a lot of toys and funny games. I spend most of my free time there.

Answer 1

W niektórych zdaniach troszkę bym pozmieniała:

I'm small and I've got 8 years old./poprawniej gramatycznie byłoby: I'm 8 years old.

To samo z twoją siostą, czyli:

She is almost 18, a nie She's got 18.

-tu musisz dopisać to co pogrubiłam:

Mobile phones are basic part of equipment for all of us.

 

Popraw jedno słówko (i dopisz):

 

I supose after all that mobile phones are the best invention ever, we owe(own) them because we want to feeling (feel) save.

 

To po polsku:

 

i słusznie-and rightly

dzięki nim-because of them (ja bym tak napisała)

 

Nie jestem pewna czy poprawiłam wszystko, bo nie jestem nauczycielem, ale tyle ile wyłapałam tyle jest :)