Question

Pomoże mi ktoś? To pilne...Z góry dziękuję :D

Zad. 4/46 - Access 2

Chciałabym, żeby ktoś, kto dobrze zna język angielski, sprawdził, czy dobrze napisałam poniższą historyjkę. Za dobrą odpowiedź -> naj ;)

Ghost in my house...

The story began did last night. I was alone in my room. While I doing my homework, I suddenly heard someone enter the house, but they weren't my parents, because my parents they were at work. I scared.

I want into the hallway to see who came to the house. I saw a ghost! Ghost also noticed me. I scared. Quickly I ran to my room, but the qhost ran after me.

I wake up. It turned out that it was a dream.

Answer 1

Zamiast:

 

"The story began last night"

 

może być:  The story took place last night.

 

Jest tak:

 

While I doing my homework, I suddenly heard someone enter the house, but they weren't my parents, because my parents they were at work. I scared.

 

A jak powinno być:

 

While I was doing my homework, I suddenly heard someone entering  the house, but that weren't my parents, because my parents  were at work. I  scared.

 

 Jest tak:

 

 I want into the hallway to see who came to the house. I saw a ghost! Ghost also noticed me. I scared. Quickly I ran to my room, but the qhost ran after me.

     I wake up. It turned out that it was a dream.

 

A powinno być:

 

 I went into the hallway to see who came into the house. I saw a ghost! He also noticed me. I scared.  I quickly ran to my room , but the qhost ran after me.

    

I woke up. It turned out, that it was a dream.

 

Jeżeli mam być szczery to zakończenie z serii: obudziłam się jest strasznie popularne, więc ja bym zmienił, że duch zniknął kiedy przekroczył próg mojego pokoju. :)

 

(Ale to tylko sugestia)

 

Answer 2

   Ghost in my house...

    The story began last night. I was alone in my room. While I was doing my homework, I suddenly heard someone was enteringin the house, but there weren't my parents, because they were at work. I scared.

      I went into the hallway to see who came to the house. I saw a ghost! Ghost also noticed me. I scared. Quickly I ran to my room, but the ghost ran after me.

     I woke up. It turned out, that it was a dream.

 

Myślę że tak jest dobrze (:

Liczę na Naj (: